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Stone Wall Love | A Poem by Felix Lugo

I don’t think anyone could ever love you as much as me.
The truth is…you’re my weakness…
Many people look up to me.
Some I know and others I will never know…
But I do know I must stay strong for them…
Your words mean so much to me
that it replays in my mind and there’s no period.
I repeat the same sentences that made me fall in love with you.
I think of you often…I lie…I think of you everyday…
The seconds seem to be hours and the days seem to be years
when I am not with you.
The biggest regret I have ever done is leaving you behind…
When my heart told me to stay…
My mind confused it with thoughts of
“where would you live? How would you survive?”
The heart slowly was battling these thoughts
and for some reason I heard my voice say “good-bye”
I know you don’t see me in the same light
that is why I will always remain in the shade.
The lost shadows that are never noticed and ignored.
I don’t know if you know this
but when I get emotional I like to look outside the window and view
“life” people, trees, birds, and the sky
for I know that somewhere in the world someone is doing the same as me.
I have smiled for years and lost my heart along the way.
I covered it with hope…
When internally I was breaking down…
I have traveled great distances
and along the way particles of my heart can be found…
Many wondered…many questioned:
How such a person as myself could not have someone to share this type of love.
I found myself questioning the same reason.
Maybe I was meant not to love but to inspire people to love.
I had a moment to share my feelings with you…
That moment we don’t always get.
People spend a lifetime for such occurrence.
Some never get to experience it.
I was very lucky to have my moment of clarity when I found you.
Your words captivated me and your presence gave me ease.
Do you remember when I first told you that I love you?
It meant the world to me…
I came a long way and even though I didn’t take you with me.
I took the most precious thing from you.
When the world around us was silent…
Just you and I…
I looked at you…you smiled with thoughts wondering…
For the first time I felt serenity.
Internally healed.
Alive again.
I felt you.
I would like to believe in that moment
our hearts were beating at the same time.
We were connected.
Like the feeling of the breath before the kiss and the touch of your embrace.
Erased everything I ever knew.
Within that moment I knew nothing but you…
You were my world…and everything I ever believed in I saw through you…
It was you that brought me here.
I had you…
Even for just a moment.
We had each other.
I left my heart behind but my memories traveled with me.
I cherish those thoughts…
Remember when you wrote my name on the stone wall?
You were being silly but I took a picture of it.
I imagined you writing my name on your heart.


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